Letter to My Birthday Boy: 18 Years Old

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Reid Jackson,

       How did we get here so fast? I feel like I was just writing your first birthday letter and now you're turning 18! I know it's cliche, but time really does fly by. I keep thinking I have so much more time with you, but the reality is that you're grown and you'll be graduating in a year. It crushes my heart to think that the majority of time that I'll ever spend with you has already happened. As a mom, all of these thoughts have been flooding my mind... "Did I teach him the right things?" "Can he survive without me?" "Did I prepare him for the real world and how to be successful?" Then the Holy Spirit calms me and I take a deep breath... remembering who you are and Whose you are. You are smart, capable, kind, respectful...a thinker and a problem-solver... stubborn, persistent, and headstrong...determined to accomplish any goal that you've set for yourself. And I love all of those things about you. 

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I know it's a stressful season right now... starting to think about adulthood, your future, friends going off to college to start their own lives, transitioning from a kid to an adult, new responsibilities, and so much pressure. I just want you to know that you don't have to have it all figured out. And that you're not alone... ever. We're not in control enough to mess up God's plans. His plan will always prevail. How reassuring is that?! And he doesn't want us to figure it out or do it alone. He just wants us to walk with him in beautiful cooperation where we say, "Ok, God. What's next? I don't want to miss it!" Because life is mostly about the journey... the growth... the sanctification... more than trying to hurry and get to the final destination. If we rush, we'll miss all of the amazing little opportunities God has for us to tell others about him! As a Christian, your final destination is secure and it's oh so good... so in the meantime, we walk this "life between two gardens" as an adventure with God. Sometimes the path isn't easy... the way is narrow...or there are thorns...or we get tired and weary because the hike is hard... but if we keep following Him...walking with Him...he always leads us to the most beautiful places. 

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Here are a few tips I have for you on your 18th birthday:

1. Always remember: you were loved long before you knew what love was—and that doesn’t expire when you turn 18.
   “I have loved you with an everlasting love.” – Jeremiah 31:3

2. Be kind. Not the easy, surface-level kind—but the kind that shows up when it’s inconvenient.
   “Be kind and compassionate to one another.” – Ephesians 4:32

3. You don’t have to have everything figured out. (Honestly, most adults are just winging it.)
   “Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding.” – Proverbs 3:5

4. Call your mom. Not just when you need something —just because it's important to take care of her heart. 
   

5. Choose people who bring peace to your life, not chaos disguised as excitement.
   “Blessed are the peacemakers.” – Matthew 5:9

6. Work hard, but don’t forget to laugh. Life isn’t meant to feel like one long to-do list.
   “There is a time for everything… a time to weep and a time to laugh.” – Ecclesiastes 3:1,4

7. If you mess up (you will), own it, learn from it, and move forward.
   “His mercies are new every morning.” – Lamentations 3:23

8. Trust your gut—and invite God into your decisions.
   “In all your ways submit to Him, and He will make your paths straight.” – Proverbs 3:6

9. Take care of your body—it’s the only place you have to live.
   “Your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit.” – 1 Corinthians 6:19

10. Money matters, but it’s not everything. Character will always matter more.
    “Better a little with righteousness than much gain with injustice.” – Proverbs 16:8

11. Don’t be afraid to stand alone if it means standing for what’s right.
    “Be strong and courageous… for the Lord your God goes with you.” – Deuteronomy 31:6

12. Say “I love you” often. You’ll never regret it.
    “Let all that you do be done in love.” – 1 Corinthians 16:14

13. Protect your peace. Not everyone deserves access to your energy.
    “Let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts.” – Colossians 3:15

14. Be brave enough to try, even if you might fail. Especially then.
    “I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.” – Philippians 4:13

15. The world needs strong men—but even more, it needs good ones. Be both.
    “Act justly, love mercy, and walk humbly with your God.” – Micah 6:8

16. Never forget where you came from—and know you can go anywhere with God guiding you.
    “For I know the plans I have for you… plans to give you hope and a future.” – Jeremiah 29:11

17. Life will change, people will change—but God never does.
    “Jesus Christ is the same yesterday and today and forever.” – Hebrews 13:8

18. Pray when you’re unsure, grateful, overwhelmed, or just because.
    “Pray without ceasing.” – 1 Thessalonians 5:17

19. When you feel weak, remember where your strength comes from.
    “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” – 2 Corinthians 12:9

20. No matter how far you go or how much life changes, you are never alone.
    “I am with you always.” – Matthew 28:20

21. And no matter how old you get, you’ll always be my greatest adventure—and one of my greatest answered prayers.
    “Every good and perfect gift is from above.” – James 1:17

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18 things I love about Reid:

1. How you love music and lyrics - and how you know who sings every song of any genre or generation. 

2. How you care for your siblings and have a unique, special relationship with each of them.

3. When you call me mama 🩷

4. How intense and passionate you are on the football field.

5. How chivalrous you are and how you treat women respectfully and like a gentleman. 

6. They way you converse with others. How you look people in the eyes, shake hands with them, and can start a conversation with anyone. 

7. How you're the life of the party and always get excited about a concert, gathering, or being a "vibe."

8. The way you dance and then say, "ayyyeeee."

9. The way you pray. That is a gift and you pray so beautifully.

10. Your brown eyes

11. Your confidence - you know who you are and what you stand for. 

12. Your grit and determination. 
If you want something, you always find a way.

13. Your adventuresome spirit! I love that you love the outdoors - hunting, fishing, hiking, wake surfing.... exploring. 

14. How much you care about and value your health. Being consistent with your supplements, always thinking about your nutrition, and taking care of your skin and body. 

15. The precious, incredible, sacred relationship you have with your dad. What a gift. 
He was the first one to hold you, slept with you nestled in the crook of his arm for your few months of life, and you've been his priority since the day you were born. 
His ultimate goal in life was for you to think he was a good dad. He's so proud of you and I love how much you two love each other. 

16. Your sense of humor and how you can make everyone laugh. 

17. The way you protect others and stand up for those who can't defend themselves.
You have the best heart and you show true empathy for others. That's one of your very best qualities. 

18. How much you love the Lord and how you are confident in His plans. 
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This is the verse I'm praying over you for your 18th year of life:

“...work out your own salvation with fear and trembling,”

Philippians 2:12 

Doesn't mean "earn your own salvation." We can't do that. That's a gift and only comes from Jesus.

DOES mean ACTIVATE your salvation/bring it to full effect with awe-inspired fear of the Lord and critical self-evaluation. 

Work towards spiritual maturity. 

There will be seasons of your faith with ups and downs, but the overall picture of you life should be an upward trajectory of looking more and more like Jesus. 

“Work hard to show the results of your salvation, obeying God with deep reverence and fear. For God is working in you, giving you the desire and the power to do what pleases him.”

Philippians 2:12-13 

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      My personality has always been to work hard and try to be the best at everything. And when it came to my parenting, that was no exception. I've tried to give you the best childhood, give you all the experiences, take you to all the places, and teach you all the things. At some point I realized that all of that is great, but all of that has to be done in the strength of the Lord... the perfect mother doesn't exist. But I hope that in the 18 years I've loved you, I've pointed you to the One who is perfect. And your relationship with him trumps every single other thing. If there's one thing you take from me or from our home, I hope it's this: Jesus is always the answer.

Reid, 

      You are the best thing that's ever happened to me...because raising you has brought me closer to the Lord. You've taught me patience, resilience, compassion, wisdom... I've grown up along with you. I haven't done it all right. I haven't always said the best things or handled things like I should have, so thank you for forgiving me for my mistakes and when I wasn't my best self. Thank you for giving me grace in my failures. And know deep in your heart that there has never been a single moment of my life when I have not loved you...and there will never be a day that I wouldn't sacrifice everything I have for you. You are a gift and a treasure. And I cannot wait to see you soar. 

All of my love always, 

Mom 

[Autosaved] Letter to My Birthday Girl: 16 Years Old

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My darling, dearest LilliAnn...on your 16th birthday,

     It's so funny, and so precious, that the same things that I were picking out at little baby boutiques the moment I found out about you, are still the types of things you love at 16! Soft pinks, florals, all things classy and feminine...with just a little whimsy... you know, things with all the "bells and the whistles"... have always been your vibe. I told you the other day that putting together your "Sweet 16" made me feel like I was planning your baby shower or decorating your nursery again. You said you were just born into your brand - and oh how true that is! You were Love Shack Fancy before there even was a Love Shack! But that's something I love about you - you've always known exactly who you are and you're so confident in who God made you to be. You know that you're living for Christ, not for man. 

      There are so many words to describe you - beautiful, kind, responsible, graceful, confident, radiant, warm-hearted, nurturing, and generous - you're the best gift giver and you're always thinking of others. You're the best supporter and encourager. One of my favorite stories about you is when you were in Kindergarten and you came home and told is the girls had been playing "fashion show" at recess. I asked what you did in the fashion show, thinking you would show me some fancy walk or describe to me what you were presenting to wear... instead, you said the girls told you you weren't pretty enough to be in the fashion show, so they made you the "clapper." As a mom, my heart sank in my chest. I told you to tell the girls the next day that you were going to walk in the fashion show at recess, and you looked at me with the sweetest smile and said, "No, mommy. I love being the clapper. I love cheering for other people." And THAT has always been your heart. You love "clapping" for others.

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      I love how soft you are but also how strong you can be. I love that you're feminine, but also fierce and resilient - an achiever and an overcomer. I love that you're capable and can handle any situation. And I love that you light up every room you walk into - without saying a word - just by your warm, confident presence. I love the woman you're becoming - it's so bittersweet with every birthday, but exciting to see you blossom into who God made you to be. 

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Here are a few tips for your Sixteenth Birthday:

1. Treasure God's Word.

Start now learning to stop it feeling and understanding God's story and His incredible love for you. It is so special and so endearing when you walk with the Lord and start having the "ah ha" moments in your heart of how it all connects when you study His Word. Always put your relationship with Christ first... ALWAYS!

2. Always make time for family. 

Stay close to your siblings. Remember, they're human and will make mistakes, but nothing makes your parents more happy than close-knit children. 

3. Marry the boy with a servant's heart.

Marry the boy who fills your car up with gas, helps your parents move you into your dorm room, and sits with you while you do your homework or goes with you to run errands. You'll know he's the one because you'll never want to be away from him and your soul will jump for joy every time you see him!

4. Romanticize your life - you've only got one. 

See the beauty in ordinary moments. Take the trip, journal, study abroad, collect unique things, try new food, laugh with lots of different types of people- don't ever get so busy that you don't truly LIVE!

5. Every time you fill up with gas, clean out your car.

Use that 5 minutes to throw away trash and wipe down your console with baby wipes. Keeping your car tidy makes your day better! 

6. Trust your gut - you know what's right.

If something feels off, it probably is. 

7. You can ALWAYS come home.

You're going to make mistakes, have disappointments, and get your heart broken. But I hope you that you can ALWAYS run to me.

8. Don't obsess about your body. 

But always move your body! Walking, Pilates, yoga, dance, spin, HEAT...it balances your hormones, decreases your risk of cancer, and it just makes your feel better! 

9. Do one thing every day that brings you joy! 

This is so good for your stress levels and cortisol levels... your mental health needs this! 

10. Don't ever do anything unless your entire being is screaming "Yes!"

Nana Karen always gave me this advice and I think about it whenever I'm having trouble making a big decision. 

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Sixteen Things I Love About Lil:

1. The way you always think of others and make sure everyone is remembered and feels special. 

2. Your beautiful, golden eyes

3. How you love the color pink 

4. Your giggle when you get really tickled about something

5. How you love a good theme or party - and always have the perfect outfit to match! 

6. The way you make friends easily because of your magnetic personality 

7. How you dance in the kitchen for fun when we're all just playing songs on Alexa 

8. How you love Nutella

9. The way you look in red

10. How you're not scared to try new things or travel to far off places... like Japan! 

11. The way you take care of your siblings

12. How responsible you are and how you always handle your business

13. How you are fearless and are always up for an adventure - you're not a delicate girl who's scared to wake surf, snow ski, hike up a mountain, or get dirty! 

14. The way you write and journal - and how good your memory is!

15. The way you love and take care of your Nana

16. Your heart for the Lord and how you shine for Jesus! 

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LilliAnn McKenzie, 

     When they first placed you into my arms, I felt like all was right in the world. I still feel that way when you're with me. I knew from the first moment I looked at your face that you were going to help me run the show! I'm so proud of you and I love you so so very much. You've always been and will always be my best girl! Being your mom has been such an incredible gift and I truly adore you. I'm praying this verse over you your sixteenth year...

"Whatever is true, whatever is admirable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is commendable, if there is any excellence, if there is anything worthy of praise, think about those things."

Philippians 4:8

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I love you always and forever, 

Mom 

[Autosaved] Letter to My Birthday Girl: 16 Years Old

My darling, dearest LilliAnn...on your 16th birthday, 

     It's so funny, and so precious, that the same things that I were picking out at little baby boutiques the moment I found out about you, are still the types of things you love at 16! Soft pinks, florals, all things classy and feminine...with just a little whimsy... you know, things with all the "bells and the whistles"... have always been your vibe. I told you the other day that putting together your "Sweet 16" made me feel like I was planning your baby shower or decorating your nursery again. You said you were just born into your brand - and oh how true that is! You were Love Shack Fancy before there even was a Love Shack! But that's something I love about you - you've always known exactly who you are and you're so confident in who God made you to be. You know that you're living for Christ, not for man. 

      There are so many words to describe you - beautiful, kind, responsible, graceful, confident, radiant, warm-hearted, nurturing, and generous - you're the best gift giver and you're always thinking of others. You're the best supporter and encourager. One of my favorite stories about you is when you were in Kindergarten and you came home and told is the girls had been playing "fashion show" at recess. I asked what you did in the fashion show, thinking you would show me some fancy walk or describe to me what you were presenting to wear... instead, you said the girls told you you weren't pretty enough to be in the fashion show, so they made you the "clapper." As a mom, my heart sank in my chest. I told you to tell the girls the next day that you were going to walk in the fashion show at recess, and you looked at me with the sweetest smile and said, "No, mommy. I love being the clapper. I love cheering for other people." And THAT has always been your heart. You love "clapping" for others.

      I love how soft you are but also how strong you can be. I love that you're feminine, but also fierce and resilient - an achiever and an overcomer. I love that you're capable and can handle any situation. And I love that you light up every room you walk into - without saying a word - just by your warm, confident presence. I love the woman you're becoming - it's so bittersweet with every birthday, but exciting to see you blossom into who God made you to be. 

Here are a few tips for your Sixteenth Birthday:

1. Treasure God's Word.

Start now learning to stop it feeling and understanding God's story and His incredible love for you. It is so special and so endearing when you walk with the Lord and start having the "ah ha" moments in your heart of how it all connects when you study His Word. Always put your relationship with Christ first... ALWAYS!

2. Always make time for family. 

Stay close to your siblings. Remember, they're human and will make mistakes, but nothing makes your parents more happy than close-knit children. 

3. Marry the boy with a servant's heart.

Marry the boy who fills your car up with gas, helps your parents move you into your dorm room, and sits with you while you do your homework or goes with you to run errands. You'll know he's the one because you'll never want to be away from him and your soul will jump for joy every time you see him!

4. Romanticize your life - you've only got one. 

See the beauty in ordinary moments. Take the trip, journal, study abroad, collect unique things, try new food, laugh with lots of different types of people- don't ever get so busy that you don't truly LIVE!

5. Every time you fill up with gas, clean out your car.

Use that 5 minutes to throw away trash and wipe down your console with baby wipes. Keeping your car tidy makes your day better! 

6. Trust your gut - you know what's right.

If something feels off, it probably is. 

7. You can ALWAYS come home.

You're going to make mistakes, have disappointments, and get your heart broken. But I hope you that you can ALWAYS run to me.

8. Don't obsess about your body. 

But always move your body! Walking, Pilates, yoga, dance, spin, HEAT...it balances your hormones, decreases your risk of cancer, and it just makes your feel better! 

9. Do one thing every day that brings you joy! 

This is so good for your stress levels and cortisol levels... your mental health needs this! 

10. Don't ever do anything unless your entire being is screaming "Yes!"

Nana Karen always gave me this advice and I think about it whenever I'm having trouble making a big decision. 

Sixteen Things I Love About Lil:

1. The way you always think of others and make sure everyone is remembered and feels special. 

2. Your beautiful, golden eyes

3. How you love the color pink 

4. Your giggle when you get really tickled about something

5. How you love a good theme or party - and always have the perfect outfit to match! 

6. The way you make friends easily because of your magnetic personality 

7. How you dance in the kitchen for fun when we're all just playing songs on Alexa 

8. How you love Nutella

9. The way you look in red

10. How you're not scared to try new things or travel to far off places... like Japan! 

11. The way you take care of your siblings

12. How responsible you are and how you always handle your business

13. How you are fearless and are always up for an adventure - you're not a delicate girl who's scared to wake surf, snow ski, hike up a mountain, or get dirty! 

14. The way you write and journal - and how good your memory is!

15. The way you love and take care of your Nana

16. Your heart for the Lord and how you shine for Jesus! 

LilliAnn McKenzie, 

     When they first placed you into my arms, I felt like all was right in the world. I still feel that way when you're with me. I knew from the first moment I looked at your face that you were going to help me run the show! I'm so proud of you and I love you so so very much. You've always been and will always be my best girl! Being your mom has been such an incredible gift and I truly adore you. I'm praying this verse over you your sixteenth year...

"Whatever is true, whatever is admirable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is commendable, if there is any excellence, if there is anything worthy of praise, think about those things."

Philippians 4:8

I love you always and forever, 

Mom