Letter to My Birthday Baby Girl: 4 Years Old

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Darling Liv, 

    You came to us after a rough storm. Our rainbow baby...8 pounds 2 ounces of God's faithfulness and evidence that He keeps his promises swaddled in a pink blanket. You were the newborn baby that should have been crying, but I was the one with the tears streaming down my face while singing "Somewhere Over the Rainbow" in that lonely NICU. I fought so hard for you...before your were even conceived, in the OR during your birth, and in the hospital bed pumping and desperately trying to get those first few drops of breast milk through your NG tube.

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Your name means "life." And interestingly, it also means peace. You have given me both. And so has the Lord. I feel like our family has been in a constant season of "hard" since your birth, and you have been the joy, the laughter, and the delight that we all needed in order to push on...me, your dad, your sister, your brothers, Nana & Papa...we all needed you the past four years. 

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Liv loves:

-make-up

-nail polish

-arts & crafts

-baby dolls

-making messes

-mermaids

-unicorns ("loonicorns")

-swimming

-all things pink

-anything sparkly

-doing hair

-face and beauty products

-her "ba ba"

-going to the park

-grilled cheese sandwiches

-strawberries

-whipped cream

-dessert or anything sweet

-dancing

-Taylor Swift

-talking to "Alexa" in the kitchen

-sprinkles

-riding her scooter ("cooter")

-Barbies

-earrings

-watching "Di Di" or Adley on YouTube

-playing with her friend Lucy

-going to tumbling

-writing her name

-coloring

-playing Donkey Kong with mommy

-taking baths

-the beach

-playing with Cece

-snuggling with Russell

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I can't stop crying because of how grateful I am, my precious baby girl. Happy 4th Birthday, my darling. I will savor every single moment of your life.

I will always love you, Mommy

Letter to My Birthday Baby Girl: 3 Years Old

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Livi Mae! You are THREE! Where in the world did the time go?! This has been one of my very favorite years with you! It's been a tough year for our family with mommy finishing up cancer treatment, but we have still had so much fun and made so many memories. The Lord has been so good to us and we have gotten closer as a family, and to the Lord. You had a "Princess Pamper Party" this year at Shawnee Beauty College and loved getting your hair done, make-up on, and nails done with all of your sweet friends. You're obsessed with make-up and painting your nails, so this was the absolutely PERFECT party for you!

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You're going to Under the Son Mother's Day Out two days a week and you are doing so well there! You love school and are getting really good at coloring! You're our little dancing girl, posing girl...our lipstick lover, mess maker, pink princess, snuggle bunny, life of the party...you are our precious JOY! You still sleep in the middle of mommy and daddy, and we haven't even put a bed in your room yet. You love spending the night with Nana and Papa, and hanging out down at the office doing "work" with Aunt Johnna.

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The Lord knew I needed you for this journey the past year, and when he gave us you He completed our precious family at the perfect time. 

I sought the LORD, and He answered me and delivered me from all my fears. Those who look to Him are radiant, and their faces shall never be ashamed. Oh, taste and see that the LORD is good! Blessed is the man who takes refuge in Him!

Psalm 34: 4-5

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Sweet Liv, I love you so much...but please don't grow up yet!

Always and forever, Mommy

Rush's Baptism. 8/23/27

What a wonderful day! Our Rushton Jeb was baptized at church today and my heart could barely handle the joy that I felt. 

Last month, there were several baptisms at church after Falls Creek and Cross Timbers, and Rush's heart was being stirred by the Holy Spirit. He's a very inquisitive child and has always asked the most insightful spiritual questions about God and the Bible. I feel like he's been in tune with the Holy Spirit from a really young age, but I also know that he's very cautious and likes to think about things and have everything figured out before he makes a decision. So when he came to me on July 5th... after a Wednesday night church service ... and told me that he was ready to become a Christian, I knew that he was confident that the Lord was speaking to him. He told me that on Sunday, he got a nervous feeling in his stomach during the invitational and felt like God was saying something to him, and then felt it again at church on Wednesday night. I remember watering the flowers and him looking at me and saying, "Mom, I've realized that if I don't have God, then I don't have anything." I asked if he wanted me to pray with him and he said yes. 

That night, he sat on the bed with Jeb and I and we read some scripture together, asked him some questions, and discussed what it means to make Jesus the Lord of your life. We held his hands and he prayed to Jesus, saying that he knows he's a sinner and needs a Savior, and would Jesus please come into his heart and be the Lord of his life. It was the most precious time. 

I remember reading and discussing John 3:16 -

“For God so loved the world, that he gave his only Son, that whoever believes in him should not perish but have eternal life.”

Romans 10:13 -

“For everyone who calls on the name of the Lord will be saved.”

John 14:6 -

“Jesus said to him, “I am the way, and the truth, and the life. No one comes to the Father except through me.”

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And Romans 10:9 - 

“because, if you confess with your mouth that Jesus is Lord and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you will be saved.”

A couple of weeks ago we met with Pastor Jeff so Rush could share with him about his decision. Pastor Jeff asked him some questions and was great at explaining things to Rush and encouraging him to stay in the Word and continue to grow in his walk with Christ. 

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All three of my big kids were 8 or 9 when they were saved and baptized, and although I didn't want to discourage any work that the Lord was doing in their lives, I always just hoped that they would remember the day, the experience, and their feelings surrounding the decision because it truly is the greatest decision they'll ever make. 

I was the same age when I made this decision, and although I remember praying the prayer to the Lord with my dad and bits about my baptism day, I don't have any pics or video and I don't remember all the details or how much I knew about the Christian life. I wanted my kids to understand the decision they were making and what it meant for them going forward as a Christian...because I've often questioned if I really understood enough when I placed my faith in Christ as that 8-year-old little girl...

But this week, just as He has been so faithful to do my entire life, the Lord provided me with some reassurance and "daily bread." In my Bible study lesson this week the question was asked, "What is the disposition of those who make up the kingdom of heaven?" And we were asked to read Matthew 19: 13-15.

“But Jesus said, “Let the children come to me. Don’t stop them! For the Kingdom of Heaven belongs to those who are like these children.””

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Good news! We don't have to have it all figured out to place our faith in Christ and become His child. We don't have to know everything in the Bible or be able to recite scripture by memory. We don't have to have perfect attendance at church or know what the word Theology means. We don't even have to have done a Bible study or know the perfect answers to what salvation is. 

All we have to do is have the faith of a child...come to him like little children...realize that we are not self-sufficient, we can't get to heaven on our own...we have to have a door...and Jesus is that door...the ONLY WAY...we need a Savior...a PERFECT, SINLESS FATHER. And place our complete trust in Him. That's it. It's that simple. Child-like faith. 

I'm so thankful that he makes it that easy. And I'm so glad that salvation is available to everyone at every age. 

During our family devotional time tonight, the kids and I had the best discussion about sanctification. 

I haven't always been the best Christian. I've had rebellious high school years, and seasons where I pushed away from the Lord. I've had years of my life where I was out of church way more than I was in church. And there are certainly days that I'm not proud of. 

But the Lord has never left me and has never given up on me...my 8-year-old self was sealed by the Holy Spirit that night that I prayed that prayer to Him. And if you look at my spiritual walk as a whole, there would be ups and downs...but there would be a general upward trajectory of learning more about, drawing closer to, and trying to look more like Jesus Christ. And that is the essence of the Christian life. 

Thank you to all the family and friends who came today and celebrated with us! There were four of Rush's teachers at church today...Pre-K - Mrs. School, Kindergarter - Mrs. Wilder, 1st - Mrs. Meyer (Wynn), and 2nd - Mrs. Neese! What a blessed day! God is so good!!