Letter to My Birthday Boy: 18 Years Old

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Reid Jackson,

       How did we get here so fast? I feel like I was just writing your first birthday letter and now you're turning 18! I know it's cliche, but time really does fly by. I keep thinking I have so much more time with you, but the reality is that you're grown and you'll be graduating in a year. It crushes my heart to think that the majority of time that I'll ever spend with you has already happened. As a mom, all of these thoughts have been flooding my mind... "Did I teach him the right things?" "Can he survive without me?" "Did I prepare him for the real world and how to be successful?" Then the Holy Spirit calms me and I take a deep breath... remembering who you are and Whose you are. You are smart, capable, kind, respectful...a thinker and a problem-solver... stubborn, persistent, and headstrong...determined to accomplish any goal that you've set for yourself. And I love all of those things about you. 

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I know it's a stressful season right now... starting to think about adulthood, your future, friends going off to college to start their own lives, transitioning from a kid to an adult, new responsibilities, and so much pressure. I just want you to know that you don't have to have it all figured out. And that you're not alone... ever. We're not in control enough to mess up God's plans. His plan will always prevail. How reassuring is that?! And he doesn't want us to figure it out or do it alone. He just wants us to walk with him in beautiful cooperation where we say, "Ok, God. What's next? I don't want to miss it!" Because life is mostly about the journey... the growth... the sanctification... more than trying to hurry and get to the final destination. If we rush, we'll miss all of the amazing little opportunities God has for us to tell others about him! As a Christian, your final destination is secure and it's oh so good... so in the meantime, we walk this "life between two gardens" as an adventure with God. Sometimes the path isn't easy... the way is narrow...or there are thorns...or we get tired and weary because the hike is hard... but if we keep following Him...walking with Him...he always leads us to the most beautiful places. 

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Here are a few tips I have for you on your 18th birthday:

1. Always remember: you were loved long before you knew what love was—and that doesn’t expire when you turn 18.
   “I have loved you with an everlasting love.” – Jeremiah 31:3

2. Be kind. Not the easy, surface-level kind—but the kind that shows up when it’s inconvenient.
   “Be kind and compassionate to one another.” – Ephesians 4:32

3. You don’t have to have everything figured out. (Honestly, most adults are just winging it.)
   “Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding.” – Proverbs 3:5

4. Call your mom. Not just when you need something —just because it's important to take care of her heart. 
   

5. Choose people who bring peace to your life, not chaos disguised as excitement.
   “Blessed are the peacemakers.” – Matthew 5:9

6. Work hard, but don’t forget to laugh. Life isn’t meant to feel like one long to-do list.
   “There is a time for everything… a time to weep and a time to laugh.” – Ecclesiastes 3:1,4

7. If you mess up (you will), own it, learn from it, and move forward.
   “His mercies are new every morning.” – Lamentations 3:23

8. Trust your gut—and invite God into your decisions.
   “In all your ways submit to Him, and He will make your paths straight.” – Proverbs 3:6

9. Take care of your body—it’s the only place you have to live.
   “Your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit.” – 1 Corinthians 6:19

10. Money matters, but it’s not everything. Character will always matter more.
    “Better a little with righteousness than much gain with injustice.” – Proverbs 16:8

11. Don’t be afraid to stand alone if it means standing for what’s right.
    “Be strong and courageous… for the Lord your God goes with you.” – Deuteronomy 31:6

12. Say “I love you” often. You’ll never regret it.
    “Let all that you do be done in love.” – 1 Corinthians 16:14

13. Protect your peace. Not everyone deserves access to your energy.
    “Let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts.” – Colossians 3:15

14. Be brave enough to try, even if you might fail. Especially then.
    “I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.” – Philippians 4:13

15. The world needs strong men—but even more, it needs good ones. Be both.
    “Act justly, love mercy, and walk humbly with your God.” – Micah 6:8

16. Never forget where you came from—and know you can go anywhere with God guiding you.
    “For I know the plans I have for you… plans to give you hope and a future.” – Jeremiah 29:11

17. Life will change, people will change—but God never does.
    “Jesus Christ is the same yesterday and today and forever.” – Hebrews 13:8

18. Pray when you’re unsure, grateful, overwhelmed, or just because.
    “Pray without ceasing.” – 1 Thessalonians 5:17

19. When you feel weak, remember where your strength comes from.
    “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” – 2 Corinthians 12:9

20. No matter how far you go or how much life changes, you are never alone.
    “I am with you always.” – Matthew 28:20

21. And no matter how old you get, you’ll always be my greatest adventure—and one of my greatest answered prayers.
    “Every good and perfect gift is from above.” – James 1:17

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18 things I love about Reid:

1. How you love music and lyrics - and how you know who sings every song of any genre or generation. 

2. How you care for your siblings and have a unique, special relationship with each of them.

3. When you call me mama 🩷

4. How intense and passionate you are on the football field.

5. How chivalrous you are and how you treat women respectfully and like a gentleman. 

6. They way you converse with others. How you look people in the eyes, shake hands with them, and can start a conversation with anyone. 

7. How you're the life of the party and always get excited about a concert, gathering, or being a "vibe."

8. The way you dance and then say, "ayyyeeee."

9. The way you pray. That is a gift and you pray so beautifully.

10. Your brown eyes

11. Your confidence - you know who you are and what you stand for. 

12. Your grit and determination. 
If you want something, you always find a way.

13. Your adventuresome spirit! I love that you love the outdoors - hunting, fishing, hiking, wake surfing.... exploring. 

14. How much you care about and value your health. Being consistent with your supplements, always thinking about your nutrition, and taking care of your skin and body. 

15. The precious, incredible, sacred relationship you have with your dad. What a gift. 
He was the first one to hold you, slept with you nestled in the crook of his arm for your few months of life, and you've been his priority since the day you were born. 
His ultimate goal in life was for you to think he was a good dad. He's so proud of you and I love how much you two love each other. 

16. Your sense of humor and how you can make everyone laugh. 

17. The way you protect others and stand up for those who can't defend themselves.
You have the best heart and you show true empathy for others. That's one of your very best qualities. 

18. How much you love the Lord and how you are confident in His plans. 
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This is the verse I'm praying over you for your 18th year of life:

“...work out your own salvation with fear and trembling,”

Philippians 2:12 

Doesn't mean "earn your own salvation." We can't do that. That's a gift and only comes from Jesus.

DOES mean ACTIVATE your salvation/bring it to full effect with awe-inspired fear of the Lord and critical self-evaluation. 

Work towards spiritual maturity. 

There will be seasons of your faith with ups and downs, but the overall picture of you life should be an upward trajectory of looking more and more like Jesus. 

“Work hard to show the results of your salvation, obeying God with deep reverence and fear. For God is working in you, giving you the desire and the power to do what pleases him.”

Philippians 2:12-13 

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      My personality has always been to work hard and try to be the best at everything. And when it came to my parenting, that was no exception. I've tried to give you the best childhood, give you all the experiences, take you to all the places, and teach you all the things. At some point I realized that all of that is great, but all of that has to be done in the strength of the Lord... the perfect mother doesn't exist. But I hope that in the 18 years I've loved you, I've pointed you to the One who is perfect. And your relationship with him trumps every single other thing. If there's one thing you take from me or from our home, I hope it's this: Jesus is always the answer.

Reid, 

      You are the best thing that's ever happened to me...because raising you has brought me closer to the Lord. You've taught me patience, resilience, compassion, wisdom... I've grown up along with you. I haven't done it all right. I haven't always said the best things or handled things like I should have, so thank you for forgiving me for my mistakes and when I wasn't my best self. Thank you for giving me grace in my failures. And know deep in your heart that there has never been a single moment of my life when I have not loved you...and there will never be a day that I wouldn't sacrifice everything I have for you. You are a gift and a treasure. And I cannot wait to see you soar. 

All of my love always, 

Mom